Maeve Birch Home

I walked Rex for the first time in almost two months and found that I had changed. Between an illness, a new project at work picking up, and leasing a horse again, I had not been able to do more than stop to visit with Rex in the pasture for a few minutes every week or so, just to show him that I still existed. For a while I let others entertain him on Saturdays. This is the benefit to not owning a horse, I’ve found out. You can be absent for a while without worrying that they’ll be feral when you return.

I spent some time learning how to let things happen without trying to shape it with worry. For a long time I thought that if I cared about something then I should spend mental energy worrying about it, and somehow that would convey to the universe that it should go how I want. More recently I’ve tried a new strategy. I ask myself “am I going to change my actions and make a change in the situation?” If the answer is yes, then I take that action. If the answer is no… I work on dropping it entirely from my mental space. It’s difficult. Worry has a way of sneaking up and grabbing you, pulling you into a circle, tugging on your thoughts. Wrestling free of it takes effort. Still, something has changed.

I walked with Rex up the neighbor’s driveway, where we hadn’t been before. That neighbor had told the barn owner last week that they could use some of the property, including the driveway, for hand walking the ponies. Rex was excited and a little nervous. As we walked I sometimes had to bring him in a circle around me to use up some of that nervous energy. Before, I would get a sort of tense rushing feel in my chest when Rex was like this. With the practice in releasing worry, though, I found I could identify and release the feeling faster. It no longer built up. In return, Rex grew calmer as we walked on, not more antsy. It was a great experience that I hope will repeat in the future.

I have a potential surprise in the near future for the book! Stay tuned…
To find out more about Rex and the other horses, read Standing in a Field With Horses, a Memoir of Equine Connection. Available from Amazon, SmashWords, and other book distributors.